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Hecht, Ben, 1894-1964

"A Thousand and One Afternoons in Chicago"

That's interesting."
"Of course it is. Pitzela's son is a man 87 years old. Ask anybody on
Maxwell street do they know Pitzela's son and they will tell you: 'Do we
know Pitzela's son? Hm! It's a scandal."
"The editor, Feodor, forbids me to write about scandals. So be careful."
"This scandal is one you can write about. This Pitzela's son is such a
poor old man that he can hardly walk. He has a long white beard and wears
a yamulka and he has no teeth and one foot is already deep in the grave.
If you saw Pitzela's son you would say: 'Why don't this dying man go home
and sit down instead of running around like this?'
"And why don't he?"
"Why don't he? Such a question! He don't because Pitzela don't let him.
Pitzela is his father and he has to mind his father. And Pitzela says:
'What! You want to hang around the house like you were an old man? You are
crazy. Look at me, I'm your father. And you a young man, my son, act like
you were my father. It's a scandal. Come, we will go to the banquet.'
"What banquet, Feodor?"
"Oh, any banquet. He drags him. He don't let him rest. And he says: 'You
must shave off your beard. For fifteen years you been letting it grow and
now it's altogether too long.


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