After this
distinct revelation had stood for some little time before my
mind, the question seemed to be put, 'will you accept it now,
to-day?' I replied, 'Yes; I will accept it to-day, or I will die
in the attempt!'" He then went into the woods, where he
describes his struggles. He could not pray, his heart was
hardened in its pride. "I then reproached myself for having
promised to give my heart to God before I left the woods. When I
came to try, I found I could not. . . . My inward soul hung
back, and there was no going out of my heart to God. The thought
was pressing me, of the rashness of my promise that I would give
my heart to God that day, or die in the attempt. It seemed to me
as if that was binding on my soul; and yet I was going to break
my vow. A great sinking and discouragement came over me, and I
felt almost too weak to stand upon my knees. Just at this moment
I again thought I heard some one approach me, and I opened my
eyes to see whether it were so. But right there the revelation
of my pride of heart, as the great difficulty that stood in the
way, was distinctly shown to me.
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