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Bierce, Ambrose, 1842-1914?

"Cobwebs from an Empty Skull"




[Illustration]

LXXXVI.

A lamb suffering from thirst went to a brook to drink. Putting his
nose to the water, he was interested to feel it bitten by a fish. Not
liking fish, he drew back and sought another place; but his persecutor
getting there before him administered the same rebuff. The lamb being
rather persevering, and the fish having no appointments for that day,
this was repeated a few thousand times, when the former felt justified
in swearing:
"I'm eternally boiled!" said he, "if ever I experienced so many fish
in all my life. It is discouraging. It inspires me with mint sauce and
green peas."
He probably meant amazement and fear; under the influence of powerful
emotions even lambs will talk "shop."
"Well, good bye," said his tormentor, taking a final nip at the
animal's muzzle; "I should like to amuse you some more; but I have
other fish to fry."
This tale teaches a good quantity of lessons; but it does _not_ teach
why this fish should have persecuted this lamb.


LXXXVII.

A mole, in pursuing certain geological researches, came upon the
buried carcase of a mule, and was about to tunnel him.
"Slow down, my good friend," said the deceased. "Push your mining
operations in a less sacrilegious direction.


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